Well Deserved

Last week was the end to my first semester of college. I was confident about how well I would do on my finals, and might have been a little overconfident. I did not do as well as I would have hoped, but in the end my GPA did not change very much, but with only a little decrease. Of course, there are freshman I know that ended up above even a 3.5 or somewhere around there, I find myself proud of a measly 2.88, but a lot on the fact that I maintained a full 18 credit hour semester. And next semester I'll know what I need to do to pull some better grades.

About two months ago, I was dating a girl who I had fallen in love with and thought that I would be spending the rest of my life her. We ended up going to two different schools only three hours away, but we did not have an easy way to see each other. It ended up being that three hours was too much for her, even though I was willing to deal with what I called the huge mountain of suck, because she said we would stay together. I was a fool who was in love, and simply enough, she lied to me. That really hurt me, and to make matters more painful, she already had another boyfriend right after she broke up with me yet after only knowing him for about two months. The kicker, she won't be going to college next year and is gonna move into an apartment with him instead.

Some people get their heart broken, but others will know how it feels to get your heart ripped out and shredded. Since then I have been attempting to move on, or at least occupy my mind so I don't think about it. I have been talking to girls but I have never been exactly the greatest, so at times it is hard to tell where I stand with them or anything along those lines.

That was until yesterday. There is this one girl that I've known the past two years, and last week we started texting each other. These past couple of days anytime my phone vibrates I always hope its a text from her. Now onto yesterday, when we hung out. We chose to go to the mall, where we pretty much just wandered around, watched a movie, went ice skating, and ate some dinner. It was all very fun, and there was never a dull moment.

The crucial moment arose during the movie. While simply kidding around by poking her in her sides to make her laugh, I decided to hold her hand. And she held my hand back. I can understand why one may not exactly see it as a big deal but I feel like it was a huge step forward. It means that while maybe I might still be hurt and broken, there is a glimmer of hope, a brighter future to look forward to.