Day 2: Hot Chocolate in Hand

Day 2. Where you’d like to be in 10 years.

This should be a simple enough thought. I will be six years removed from college, six years as an officer in the United States Navy. By this point I should already have received my Surface Warfare Officer pin as well as become an 0-3 or Lieutenant. I will have served my two sea tours, probably stationed once near home and then the second one overseas maybe in Asia or Europe. In ten years I should be in the middle of my first shore tour. I am not sure if it would be maybe somewhere cool, possibly Australia or some other cool location from which I can launch some cool world travels. Or maybe I'll be stationed at a university NROTC unit or the Naval Academy as an instructor while getting my Master's degree. At this point maybe I will be happily married to a woman I can see as anything but amazing. Maybe we'll have our first kid around this time, someone I can bring up in this world to be an amazing man or woman. 

Sadly this can only be what I hope to have in ten years. There are no guarantees, nothing anyone can truly promise. But in the end at least I know what I want, something that I will strive for.

Day 1: Oh Darling

Today it started snowing, it was these little flurries at nine in the morning. Of course the whole time I was up I could only think about how once I dropped off the painting I could try to go back to sleep. It was cold and I was not enjoying it all that much since I was not wearing anything really warm. Thirty minutes later I returned to my dorm and back to the bed I went. Last time we had flurries it was not all that cold and none of it stuck so I was not expecting anything but an hour later when I get out of bed I saw a thin layer on the grass. I am very excited since if the weather can stay cold I might just be able to go snowboarding during my spring break.

Now onto another clerical thing, the monstrous painting. Five by seven foot painting themed on "Where My Country Calls"

Although from the photo it may not look like much but it is taller than me and pretty cool.

As follows is my first attempt at daily blogging, lets see how this goes:

Day 1. Your current Relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

I am not all that great at being single. This whole idea of trying to meet single females and to find mutual interest in each other is one of those skills I am not all to good at doing. It does not help that I prefer to devote most of my time to just one person, something that simply is not feasible when single. Of the relationships I have been, the ones that have worked out better are with girls that I have been at least good friends for some time. I have made some female friends here at college but I have yet to become close with any of them, and when you add in the fact that they too have other friends it is sometimes hard to really get some good one on one time to get to know them. I suppose the best logic would be to be more upfront about it and simply ask them out but not a skill I am the greatest at either. As well I see less pressure with simply asking to hang out but that just makes it easier for others to intrude. 

One might thing that I am trying to rush into a relationship but that is not what I am implying. I might be kind of young but I can't see myself doing casual and instead I feel like I want to find the right girl. Someone who I see as perfect, who I would want to spend the rest of my days with. I simply just want to find happiness and I wish I had some clue as to make it just a little easier to find, but I guess that the best things in life are stuff you have to work towards.

Changing the Game Plan

I have for a while been desiring to Blog a lot more often. My post seem to feel far and few between. The most predominant reason has been my inability to find something to write about, and below I have found it. Stolen from Our Drifting Conscience (Note: If you do follow that link, realize that it is multiple people blogging on the same thirty day topics). I bring you my promise to attempt to blog for thirty days consecutively about the following things. I shall proceed to begin tomorrow. The rest of my evening will be jammed packed with a nap, a physics test, and painting (Once the monstrous five by seven foot painting is done, I shall more than likely post at least one picture). Hopefully I will be able to get food, oh how I hope I can.

Day 1. Your current Relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 2. Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Day 3- What are your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 4. Your views on religion.
Day 5. A time you thought about ending your life. {Your worst moment}
Day 6. Write 30 interesting things about yourself {Things others may not know}
Day 7. Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Day 8. A moment you felt most satisfied in your life {your happiest moment}
Day 9. How you hope your future will be like.
Day 10. Discuss your first love and first kiss.
Day 11. Put your iPod on shuffle and write down the 10 songs that pop up.
Day 12. Your dream college.
Day 13. Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.
Day 14. Your earliest memory.
Day 15. Your favorite blogs
Day 16. Your views on mainstream music.
Day 17. Your highs and lows of this past year.
Day 18. Your beliefs.
Day 19. Disrespecting your parents.
Day 20. How important you think education is.
Day 21. One of your favorite shows.
Day 22. How have your changed in the past 2 years.
Day 23. Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous whom you find attractive.
Day 24. Your favorite movie & what it’s about.
Day 25. Someone who fascinates you and why.
Day 26. What kind of person attracts you.
Day 27. A problem that you have had
Day 28. Something that you miss.
Day 29. Goals for the next 30 days.
Day 30. Your highs and lows of this month!

First Time In a Long Time

I have decided that this evening I would like to play a game, of course whenever you read this, it may not happen to be evening. Nonetheless, let us ignore that discrepancy, and view what I have taken from kirby's blog. Before then, possibly since I shall consider this an epic journey into a Blog question and answer game, maybe we need some music which I have gotten from the blog Rob and Annie's Tunes for Every Occasion which I must say is a pretty cool blog with some pretty cool playlists.

A: Something I am sad about: That the four weeks till spring break is seemingly so very far away

B: Favorite band: The obvious choice for me would be Relient K of which I have just about every song they have ever written, played, distributed.

C: Who I like and why I like them: I am not entirely sure as to who I would put. There are plenty of nice girls but I am still looking for that girl I would feel would be the best to be with. Maybe I have already met her, or maybe I haven't but I have to keep looking.

D: Dream house/place to live and why: I feel like I would like a house with multiple stories. Maybe with a large living room with an over hang. I'm not entirely sure, but it would at least have that.

E: Post a recent photo of yourself:

F: My favorite movie: I think I would have to say Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World which I have found very epic and have even read the graphic novels it is based off of

G: Sexual orientation: Straight

H: Do I smoke/drink? No I have not, and never will smoke. On the other hand maybe one day I will drink but when will not be very soon

I: Have any tattoos or piercings? I have not been inked but I think one day I will, but I am not sure yet of what, since it'll be permanent I will definitely think it through

J: What I want to be when I get older: As of right now I want to be an officer in the United States Navy, but I don't think that its what I want to do my entire life. Maybe I will become a teacher, it has been something I have considered.

K: Relationship with my parents: Decent enough, I don't always talk to them much but I have been trying to include them a little more in my life when I am at home.

L: One of my insecurities: That I might fail, that I will lose everything that I have worked for

M: Virgin or not? Not at all

N: Favorite place to shop at?  Barnes and Nobles. I really like to read and I really like buying books

O: My eye color: Dark Brown, sometimes people say they kinda look black

P: Why I hate school: I really do like school but I am not a huge fan of having to write papers

Q: Relationship status as of right now: Single, lonely, either word works.

R: Favorite song at the moment: Wavin' Flag by K'naan or Only The Good Die Young by Glee

S: A random fact about myself: I have a whole list

T: Age I get mistaken for: Typically its children who think I am like 20 or older

U: Where I want to be right now: I think either I would want to be on a sailboat right now or snowboarding. Either activity would please me

V: Last time I cried: I don't tend to cry very often but I believe it was the last time that I really got angry at her fro what she did

W: Concerts I’ve been to: Hinder

X: What would you do if your parents forbid you from dating someone? I feel like I would never want to date someone they would end up forbidding.

Y: Do you want to go to college: Yes, which is why I am doing so right now and I am glad to be here

Z: How are you? I would have to say adequate, life seems to be calm, nothing exciting.

I Think Therefore I Exist

Life can suck. That seems to be a simple enough statement. There are times when life truly sucks, but then sometimes it does not. Can much more be said than that? Is there something that I am missing? I feel that ranting about sadness might not be fun, but I believe that in doing so I might be able to discover some universal truth.

I am making my best attempts to move forward in my life but there are times when memories are triggered by the simplest of things. Its hard to not get angry, all the happiness that you once had, all gone, and you did nothing wrong. You can make every attempt to keep things going, but its not a one sided game, if your partner lets it slip through the cracks there is nothing you can do. She falls for some other guy, someone you never met, someone you never would have trusted, it was all in your gut, and you even let these feelings come to the light of day but it never mattered.

She seems to want to go back to where we were before it all started. To be just friends, but I feel like a lot of that friendship was based in feelings for each other, and she is not entirely like that girl she was before. I don't believe I could do that, it would be to easy to find those feelings again, to fall again. As well there feels to be too much pain and anger, all which would need to be let out before anything can happen, she must bear the burden of strife and hardship before I can truly forgive her.

She feels no need to hear what I believe is the truth, yet if she herself did not believe it she could ignore it and take it in stride, but only if she believes it would she see the need to hide from it. Could that be why, she wants to talk but cannot bear my anger, the written word could easily be weakened. There is no voice, no volume to it, much of the true emotion is void.

That alone does not simply anger me even more. Given the opportunity pain could be made more bearable if one is not alone, someone to hold, to be there for you. You left me behind, all alone, and you yourself are not. How am I supposed to feel? How can you expect me to be able to go to something so quickly? It feels like I was hit by a bus, yet you try and say things that are of no help. In simplicity, you may have done what you think was the right thing, but guess what, I think you fucked up. It might be a strong word that typically should not be used, but there is little else of any way to make that statement.

For those who may have made it this far, which I feel like not many have even come close, I apologize for the previous rant. Stream of thought can be a very tedious thing to read through.

A friend sent me a video the other day to watch. I must say, it succeeds in its purpose, which is to motivate. The following is the video, and I must say, it truly reaches deep and can strike a good chord or two.

The video comes from a site called Spartan Race. This concept that has been created is a very intense, as it is not entirely about strength of body but about the strength of heart. I myself hope that one day, I too can complete a Spartan Race, that one day I will be as strong as I can possibly be, and do things I never imagined. May this be my attempt at my own greatness, to show that I can do what I set out for myself to do.

Tell Me What I'm Looking For

I returned to school yesterday, leaving behind the relaxed and informal life once again for a more rigid military one. I am in no way sad to be back because I look forward to this semester as an opportunity to build upon the experiences of the past, to become better academically, mentally, and physically.

To sum up my first college trip, it was filled with plenty of snowboarding, video games, and friends.

Although there was not a lot of snow and half the trails were not open, we enjoyed what we got because simple enough, you have to keep on. The benefit to snowboarding during the week, was that the slopes were never crowded and we were able to gain some sense of proficiency. When not boarding, we typically stuck to several hours of Super Smash Bros Melee, as well as other games, while drinking large amounts of Dr. Pepper and Diet Sierra Mist.

Now back to the concept of school. I will be taking 19 credit hours and they are as follows:

• Exploration Engineering Design
• First-Year Writing
• Calculus
• Vector Geometry
• Seapower and Maritime Affairs
• Foundations of Physics 1 (Lab as well)
• Fundamentals of Cadet Leadership

Lets just say it seems I have my work cut out for me, but I believe that if I apply myself well enough, chances are I should be able to do it. And now it shall be set, my goal is to have a 3.15 GPA for the semester which should bring up my overall GPA to at least a 3.0.

Watch Out For Parking Lots

Step 1: Set on Fire
Step 2: Eat
-S'more Instructions

Today I began my first college trip, one set out upon with some of my closest friends who attend school with me. I suppose there is not much to it. My best friend's girlfriend's parents own a timeshare at a ski resort. They were so kindly as to allow us the use of it this glorious last week of winter break.

As follows are a few pictures of our amazing accommodation, as well as my best friend and his girlfriend playing Just Dance 3, which I might add is kind of fun. After several hours of Wii video games, with an hour or so pizza break, we entirely redecorated the whole living room area with soda cans, water bottles, and various controllers. We also consumed candle cooked S'mores.